3 Ways Leaders Unknowingly Sabotage Their Success

Leadership Coaching Notes April 2008

3 Ways Leaders Unknowingly Sabotage Their Success

These were tough times. The economy was eroding business metrics. One of Galen’s best leaders resigned for family reasons. A good client was complaining about bad service. Galen knew others looked to him for leadership, but these mornings he struggled to get out of bed, much less be the courageous and inspiring leader they wanted. I discovered Galen had to break the vicious cycle of “3 P’s thinking” that erodes leaders’ confidence, enthusiasm and impact. Learn about the “3 P’s” and what you can do to move through hard times with more agility and less pain.

What Worked

Stop Taking It PERSONALLY: Because Galen experienced the pain of setbacks so personally, he falsely interpreted them as personal attacks. When he reset his perspective, he faced facts, not attacks. He stopped reacting and started exploring options. He used his strengths as a problem solver and started taking responsibility for moving forward.

What You Can Do: Emotions are “e-motions” or energy for motion. Feel them and then use their energy to change. Consider the questions: How would I advise my best friend in this situation? How would a great leader advise me? Who would I be without my limiting thoughts? Reconnect with what is most important to you. Accept the long-term challenge, not the short-term defeat. List your personal and team resources, then use them to start making constructive choices.

Don’t Let Your Funk Be PERVASIVE: Galen let his discouragement bleed across his whole worldview. He sheepishly admitted he felt flattened like a teenager who had just lost his first love. Not a resourceful stance! He had lost sight of his strong network, activities that energized him, a spiritual faith that had pulled him through other tough times. Only when he realistically sized up each discrete change, prioritized the challenges and used his rich resources did he stop spiraling down.

What You Can Do: Baseball players “shrink the game.” They learn to do their best on this one pitch, this one at bat or this one play. They zero in on what is most important, now. Shift your focus away from the disappointments and shrink your game to your next opportunity to re-build successfully. Make your next decision and actions winning moments. Winning moments build a winning game.

Stop Believing The Problems Are PERMANENT: Galen deepened his hopelessness by discounting his opportunities to change. He realized “hope” was an active, not a passive verb. He thought about the future he wanted to create, chose courage, and started climbing back. The more action he took, the more energized he felt and the more effective he became.

What You Can Do: Listen to Martina McBride’s hit song, “Anyway.” Life doesn’t guarantee that you will succeed, but you can guarantee that that you will feel proud that you did your best. Sometimes your best IS getting out of bed every morning. Remember how you moved through other hard times successfully. Pull together all the help you can find. Nourish your spirit generously and get back on the horse that threw you. Guarantee your pride and you will certainly increase the odds of success.

Business Impact

Galen strengthened his resilience, a key leadership competency these days. Galen courageously chose a positive perspective. He accepted the challenge to increase his creativity, learn ways to energize himself and others, mobilize his people to accomplish milestones that built their hope, and created lots of reasons to celebrate. Over time, he became the courageous and inspiring leader he wanted to be. He and his team recovered their resilience, turned things around and learned practices that made them stronger professionals for the long term.

What’s Next

Use and share these ideas. If you find yourself stuck in the 3P’s and want to get out faster, contact me. Like Galen, a coaching program can support you in shifting your leadership impact and personal satisfaction.

If leaders you coach want to improve their resilience in tough situations, suggest that they call me. I am never too busy for your referrals. Our first conversation is always without charge.

Liked the article? Didn’t like it? Have any questions? Drop me a line mkimbell@corporateadventure.com. I’d love to hear from you!

All the best,

Meredith Kimbell
Executive Advisor,Strategy Consultant
Corporate Adventure

Leadership Coaching Notes uses real or composite client examples drawn from 25 years of coaching and consulting with leaders committed to solving their toughest personal, interpersonal and organizational issues.
Unless otherwise attributed, all material is copyrighted by Meredith Kimbell © 2011. All rights reserved. You may reprint any or all of this material if you include the following:
“Leadership Coaching Notes © 2011 Meredith Kimbell, Corporate Adventure, Reston, VA. Used with permission.”